See the World
Today was our first day off of work since we arrived and to get us acquainted with Tianjin our managers English speaking assistant showed us some sights! He’s wonderful and to top it off, he just found out he got into the Masters program of his choice so he insisted on taking us girls out to dinner to celebrate. After walking around the full day seeing the Asian Heritage walk, going up in the Tianjin Eye (giant ferris wheel) and general galavanting and picture taking, we were treated to traditional hotpot with our glorious host. A genuine travel experience complete with us finding out that we like hotpot, can’t handle tooo much chili sauce and that white wine means something completely different here. Like, it means shot glasses of clear, potent, painful liquid that was too much for any of us. I am dying to know how it’s made, I’d be willing to bet my goat there’s no grapes in it and I bow to the person who can drink a whole glass of it!
This experience of travel is amazing. I was thinking today how lucky I’ve been of late. Just counting 2012 I have seen my family in Cincinnati (and run a 5k with my mom), gone to NYC for the first time ever with my best friend and my true love, spent Christmas and Easter in Melbourne with Dan’s wonderful family that I now call my own, fished on Phillip Island, hiked the Grampian’s, run/gimped a 15k in Aukland and now I’m daily doing yoga, running 5k’s and discovering local cuisine in Tianjin, China. And we’re not even halfway through the year! I find it ironic, as I never put much energy into deciding to travel. I love to dance, I love to perform and I always always wanted a lifetime partnership. Most other things take a far backseat in my life. And yet, by luck, by fate I have been to so many places I never dreamed of going! I can’t believe I’ve lived outside the United States for 2+ years now and I don’t know how long I will be gone.
It’s really amazing to finally come to the point in your life where you just realize how at peace you are. I never knew peace like I do now. I have a lover, perfect in my estimation, I love our life together. And no matter where we go from here his love has changed me, his love has given to me things I can’t even express. Even if it ends, I am at peace with who we are in this moment and who I know I will be in the next. I may not have achieved all I dreamed in my career but I have a career, and I have achieved things in it that I would have never thought to dream. I am at peace with where it may or may not lead, comforted by the knowledge that it is constantly evolving and changing. I am, at long last, at peace with myself, knowing that like my career I am evolving and changing, but also that I have freedom of choice and personal power that I just didn’t believe in before. I am not a helpless bystander, I am everything there needs to be for me to exist. That doesn’t mean I don’t feel insecure somedays or have my “fat” days still where I feel bad about my body, but they are so easy to put in perspective now.
I guess all this rambling is to say that I am surprised and relieved to find that I sort of understand the something I never could grasp before. That theory that to be still and let the positive and negative thoughts and energies flow in and out of your conciousness and not be changed by those fleeting opposites, was something attainable. I feel more often then not now, like a vessel that sees and hears and feels but knows a deeper plain that is solely an observer. I truly believe that many of my experiences but mostly travel has pushed me towards this awareness. I see more clearly now how similar humans are and yet, in contrast, how unique individuals are.
Okay, thats my day off rambling for now 🙂 I can’t write solely about workouts, there’s so much more to life. But I still like my fitness. Tomorrow I’m looking forward to another run, I’m loving them so here!