Ask Dan. I’ve been a black cloud lately. I’ve mentioned it a few times already. Believe me, I know I’m no treat right at this moment.
Even so I woke up this morning after a very long day yesterday and a very short night of sleeping and knew, KNEW I had to find the energy to get my workout in before work was over. If I didn’t I was sure it wouldn’t happen and I just can’t keep skipping workouts. I workout for my figure but also for my brain, that regular release of endorphins does me good especially when I’m blue. Plus, I like having constants and committments in my life (coffee and working out are my favorite choices. and Dan. Dan is my choice) So I tried my aforementioned tactics. This time I told myself (after a large coffee of course) that I had “so much energy I just HAVE to work it out somehow or I’ll run around like a crazy person” and when I started to feel really fatigued between sets I pretended I was so hyped up I couldn’t stay still and did jumping jacks to “burn off some of this extra energy”. AND you better believe it worked! I did Ab Ripper at 9:30am, then I split Legs and Back into two parts so I could do it in between my sets. All of this was done before 1:30pm. Boo. Ya! and by that time I really did have extra energy. So sing it with me now “what am I going to do with all this extra energy?!!!” It helps, truly. “Act as if” if my new religion. Act as if – I love my job, I love my thighs, I have too much energy, I’m not a big fan of french fries, I always get my way… this works for so many things. Hmmm, I think there was a book written about this. Come to think of it, do I sound kind of like the just read “The Secret” or “The Law of Attraction”? I never actually read The Secret, but a long time ago I read “The Law of Attraction”. I may have made a few wise cracks along the lines of “I know I’m going to have a million dollars and D cup boobs. I just know it!” . Well you win this one Universe. I have asked and I have recieved. Energy that is, and the ability to work out when I woke up exhausted and cranky. 30X er, 90X is on track!! Yay me
Positivity is, like so many things in life, something you can cultivate if you don’t find that it comes naturally (in my opinion of course). I would say, generally I’m a pretty positive person but there have been some outside influences that have really changed me for the better.
I have a favorite part of my week that I haven’t really told you about before. I text message more then I call, I’m not much of a phone person and I’m a huge efficiency person. I find texting to be more efficient then talking on the phone 90% of the time. I also (not very efficiently) love to save texts. Sometimes it’s so I remember the data that’s conveyed but more often then not it’s just sentimental. This is nothing new I’ve been saving texts for years, often putting off getting a new phone so I didn’t have to lose certain special texts. But at least once a week I run out of space for messages on my phone and I get to go through and clean them out. This is a huge shot of positivity in my day. My inbox is full of fun, sexy, beautiful, loving and funny texts from Dan. We text a lot. A lot, a lot, like multiple times each day – somedays less but every single text is positive. We argue sometimes, of course (see above how I am not a treat this week), but I’ve never ever gotten an angry or agressive or insulting text from Dan. When we disagree we disagree in person 🙂 So whenever my inbox is full I get to got through all my texts and choose which ones to keep and which ones to part with and regardless of my choices re-reading all the texts from the week (and some I’ve saved for months) is a reminder of love and positivity and how to treat those you love with kindness, affection, silliness and all the important qualities that are so important to preserve in EVERY relationship you have. I feel extra lucky and if I was feeling blue or cranky towards Dan reading those texts reminds me how lucky I am (and ups D’s chance of getting lucky later that night…)
Another positive reminder I have (that will similarly make you puke) is on my computer. Months ago Dan had one of his best friends from home visit. One night I met them out after I was done with work. Unbeknownst to me a picture was taken of Dan and I and when his friend left she changed my desk top wallpaper as a surprise when I next opened my computer. This is the picture she took and it’s still my wallpaper:
I didn’t know that’s how we looked at each other but I’ve never felt so loved. It’s candid and unposed and I adore it. And every time I see it I’m reminded of lucky I am, how lucky we are. and how cool Dan’s friend Nicola is (you sneaky lady you!)
I know that you can’t take these things for granted – love, affection, humor, time spent together, good friends, kindness. It’s easy for people to treat each other poorly, to take each other for granted, to say cruel things when their angry, to shut people out. It’s a gift every time that doesn’t happen. And so, although I don’t believe it’s wrong to vent, or too allow yourself to feel bad or sad or angry when you are, I am so fortunate to have these awesome things in my life and to have constant reminders. I feel like I have a good habits, like our relationship has good habits of communication and love. And habits are so hard to break…