I took a nap, did laundry and then ran 6 miles today reaching a goal I had set for this week. Boom! and running helped me remember who I am and why I run, workout, live an active life.

I have my ups and downs. And no matter what I’m feeling, good bad or otherwise I keep moving. At the root of me I know who I am no matter how much I weigh. and through my years I have come to know and to prove to myself that though I may fear things, I will still be me no matter what my size. And I’ll still be worthwhile either way. I’m a good person, I’m an ambitious person. Warts and all by committing to my runs, by committing to my fitness I care for me, my body and mind wherever I happen to be at. That is where I find my freedom. That is where I fight my fear of abandonment. By running today I choose to care for myself. Because, friends, in the past I have been on the losing end of a toothbrush and a toilet bowl. I have struggled and I have found how to live, not just to survive but to thrive. and if I can, on a daily basis accept the fact that I have certain fears, certain weaknesses and yet still care for myself then I’ve won, I’ve beaten those fears, I’ve beaten my past, I’ve conquered abandonment (the big A). and I can move on from those things and in turn love other people not out of my need or my deficiency, but out of my abundance.

And so, as far as I can tell, my commitment to fitness, to wellness, to athletics will continue.

Next topic, something less deep and more superficial 😉


About evafitness

I fell into fit-love like falling into a well! I started this blog because I realized how much of my day I spent working out, trying new physical activities, reading fitness blogs and the like. Now I'll share my questions, findings and general fitness environment with y'all!!

Posted on September 22, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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